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I (27F) met a guy on a dating app. One detail that may be relevant: we actually matched before, things fizzled out, and then he reconnected with me later.

When he reached back out, he told me he was looking for something serious. I told him I was open to getting to know each other, but preferred that we start off as friends and see where things naturally went. Before meeting, we both agreed we'd FaceTime, meet in person, and see how we felt before deciding whether to continue.

We've now been on two dates. The first was drinks/coffee and the second was a coffee/lunch date. Both were casual, but I actually liked that because I felt like I got to know him better. I've had men spend much more money on dates before and still not be interested in me, so I don't really equate expensive dates with genuine interest.

Overall, the dates have gone well. Conversation flows, he follows up, he plans things, and he's already mentioned wanting to take me on a proper dinner date. We haven't kissed, the hugs have been pretty casual, and things are moving at a slower pace than I'm used to.

The reason I'm considering asking is because I had a previous experience where a guy did all the "right" things, went on multiple dates with me, and then suddenly told me he wasn't feeling it. I felt blindsided and like my time had been wasted.

I'm not looking for reassurance or a commitment. I don't want to ask, "Do you like me?" or "Where is this going?"

I more want to ask something like:

"Now that we've had a chance to meet in person a couple of times, how are you feeling about everything so far?"

Would that be reasonable after 2 dates, or should I just continue dating and let things unfold naturally?

For context, he's still initiating, planning dates, and staying in contact, so there aren't any obvious signs of disinterest. I just don't want to ignore the original purpose of meeting in person, which was to see how we felt before continuing.